El Roi

The God who sees me...

Just like Hagar. This was said to me recently by a friend of mine and then confirmed today by the wonderful miracle that occurred. Take a journey with me if you will. There were things I wanted. Wanted, not needed. Very very specific items. They are trivial in the scheme of things so I pushed them out of my mind. And suddenly, they appear in my mailbox. From someone and her friends who have never met me, but felt Gods urging to send them. It was very sepcifically what I wanted. Without me asking. Yes He is the God who sees me, and He sees you too! 

My post on FB :

Thank you Jesus for loving me and calming my fears and for keeping me close. I received the most incredible blessing/gift in the mail today from one of my sweet spiritual daughters....JUST exactly, what I needed!!! (Wanted) On so many levels. It brought me to tears. 

Thank you to Dallas Farrell for hearing from God and being willing to listen. Thank you to your prayer group also for lifting me up. I am so humbled and honored by Gods love for me. God keeps showing up & I wonder why I ever doubt. 

Powell Paraphrase:

Psalm 73 

Surely the Lord is good to me, even though my feet had almost slipped because I have envied people in the world and wanted what they have. I have been bitter and shaken my fist at God, "It's not fair!" I have said I've done everything right. I have made good choices and been obedient to Gods calling...and yet I have suffered so much. While people who reject Him seem to get everything they want! But God has shown me once again, how He provides. He has reminded me of where I belong. He stays right beside me and shows up in the most incredible ways! He alone is enough for me, regardless of the trials of this life.

Bride to be...

Song of Solomon 3:4
I have found the one whom, my Soul loves...

Take a moment and imagine with me,  a bride-to-be. She's spent hours and hours and hours of time and hundreds if not thousands of dollars on the perfect dress, the perfect hair, the makeup, the nails, the shoes etc...as she prepares to walk down the aisle to see her bridegroom for the very first time, as she anticipates that first glance and the smile meant only for her. Her heart races and her adrenaline is pumping...and she can barely focus, its all surreal and she is barely able to take in every detail that surrounds her ...but she is absolutely ...STUNNINGLY beautiful. And she is happier in that moment than she can recall. Her soon to be husband's breath is taken away at the sight of his beautiful bride. A tear forms in his eye...they lock eyes and her energy and heart rate are elevated. She cannot wait to take this man...

Sometimes I feel like Jesus has spent everything He has and has fully invested himself...He stands waiting with anticipation of His "first look"...and instead of a beautiful blushing bride, eagerly and gracefully coming toward Him, he sees me. A dirty, unkempt, unconcerned, unprepared, underdressed, and worse...indifferent, aloof, selfish and thoughtless woman who spent zero time, money or thought on receiving Him or giving myself to Him. 

I am so thankful that in spite of what He'd see...He WOULD still want me and Love me. He has already invested everything and is not going to stand me up! 

But I can't help wondering: 

What would Jesus really  see as my bridegroom if He were to come tomorrow?

What can I do to prepare myself as a bride-to-be ought to? 

Why is it so easy to forget that He is REAL and He IS returning? 

Why is it, I/We would or have invested more money, more time, more energy, more thought....preparing and planning for an earthly wedding, so concerned with "that first look" of the one we are betrothed to, than we do for our Spiritual and Heavenly bridegroom? 

Random-relevent-middle-of-the-night Psalm??

So I have been going through a tremendous season of pain. Deep heart pain, grief, lonliness. A season of Job where many many things (mostly material, but some people also) have been taken from me. I have been thrust into new and scary and difficult situations and I have had to rely on the Lord financially and physically in ways I have not had to before. To say it's been hell and that I am weary is an understatement. 

But tonight i rejoice once again in Gods word. Once again, my love for Scripture prevails. I wept BITTERLY tonight. Its 2:30 a.m. And I have been up for nearly 24 hours. I am broken. I cried out to the Lord and I asked Him to hear my cries....and suddenly the image, Psalm 61 came to my mind. I thought, are you sure God? Psalm 61? Who reads psalms 60's they aren't the more well known verses. And surely it can't be relevent. Isn't David just lamenting about his enemies for most of those chapters? 

But the Lord was insistent. So I blew my nose, wiped my eyes and looked up Psalm 61 

Psalm 61^[a]

For the director of music. With stringed instruments. Of David.

¹ Hear my cry, O God;
    listen to my prayer.

² From the ends of the earth I call to you,
    I call as my heart grows faint;
    lead me to the rock that is higher than I.

For you have been my refuge,

    a strong tower against the foe.

⁴ I long to dwell in your tent forever
    and take refuge in the shelter of your wings.^[b]
5 For you, God, have heard my vows;
    you have given me the heritage of those who fear your name.

6 Increase the days of the king’s life,

his years for many generations.
7 May he be enthroned in God’s presence forever;
 appoint your love and faithfulness to protect him.

⁸ Then I will ever sing in praise of your name

 and fulfill my vows day after day.

Wow. The first part of this...I could have written myself!  It was my personal lament. My personal hearts, ache, longing...for God to show up! 

But even as I read on and chose to receive the promise, that God is my refuge, and I can find shelter in His wings, I realized, also...He has given me the Heritage of those who also feared His name! What a blessing their testimonies have been in my life! I am also not a king or queen per se but by being faithful, I too can be enthroned in Gods presence forever. Both literally in the NEXT life, but isn't that also what I am doing when I am meditating on His word? Especially when He gives it to me in such a supernatural way....His presence is with me, RIGHT NOW! As I read those very words. I can CHOOSE to rest on the promise that no matter what I see or feel ...I am protected by Gods LOVE and faithfulness. And that makes me of course...want to 

sing in praise of your name

 and fulfill my vows day after day.

Halellujah. 

King of the Jungle

No matter what happens in my life, no matter who offends me, or comes against me, No matter how difficult circumstances are. I KNOW who is on the throne! And HE has my back. He sustains me.
Psalm 3:5 
I lie down and sleep;
I wake again, because the LORD sustains me.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NZFwLYvPi4c

I feel like JOB sometimes.

Sometimes when life gets hard, I hear the voice of Jobs wife " Why don't you just curse God and die!" Not that my troubles, are anything compared to Job ha ha...but sometimes the temptation is to wallow in misery and blame and question God. Jobs response was "Shall we accept blessings from God and not the bad stuff?" (Powell paraphrased) " The Lord gives and the Lord takes away...Blessed be the name of the Lord" so then I ask God...during my hard moments, "okay...then Lord what do you require of me during this time? What shall my response be to those who hurt me?" And then Micah 6:8 comes to mind "He has shown you, O man, what is good. And what does the Lord require of you? To act justly and to love mercy and to walk humbly with your God." Justice, tempered with Mercy and humbly placing myself and my trials and those who have hurt me, at His feet. So. That's what I am going to do! That and Praise God in ALL things. 
Thank you Jesus for your word.

Powell Paraphrase Col. 3: 10-15

Colossians 3: 10-15 POWELL PARAPHRASED

...You have been given fullness in Christ, who is the head over every power & authority. When you were dead in your sins, ... God made you ALIVE with Christ! He forgave all your sins. ... He took it away and nailed it to the Cross. He DISARMED the powers and authorities, he made a public spectacle of them, triumphing over them by the Cross. This was not done by the hands of men, but by Christ. Christ who lives IN you!

God's Kindess = Repentance

Its Gods Kindness that leads people to repentance, Romans 2:4! 

And it's Holy Spirits job to bring about conviction...
Remember that the next time you want to "call out" someones "bad choices" "in love". The position of Judge and Jury has already been filled...and HE does so with Mercy, Grace and Genuine Love...God does not bash people over the head with their sins. So when we feel compelled to do so...we are not acting as proper agents of God. We are not doing so with His power...and if thats true, then we must ask ourselves, who do I really represent here? Don't let the enemy use you to bring condemnation to others. don't act as an agent of darkness. Be Christlike. Be love. Lead people to the Truth by using KINDNESS. 

Thanks for the reminder Linda Lauritzen and friend...